I honestly do believe that life is short and we should do as much as we can to enjoy our time here.
I have lost some really wonderful people way before their time and this has taught me to relish life, even it’s challenges as it’s the being here that matters. If you don’t do things you want to do, you just stagnate and what a waste that would be.
My partner and I were listening to music the other night and he asked me what my funeral song would be (yep, we’re THAT kind of couple) and I responded with KLF ft Tammy Wynette – Justified and Ancient. He didn’t exactly scoff at it but he said “wow, I want my funeral song to say something about me” and my response was “I want my LIFE to say something about me”. I mean, I see his point, maybe it’s a bit frivolous to have such a happy song associated with my death but I don’t want to get to the end thinking “what a waste of time”, since a really dark period a few years ago, I’ve decided I want to push myself more, achieve more and quite honestly, live more. I’m not talking massive things, but even small things that I achieve will make me a better person. For this reason I started the 40 for 40 challenges, as something to have in mind over the next few years which I can aim for. I feel that even if I fail, at least i’ve tried and sometimes, that is what it’s all about, trying.
I know that sometimes, taking the first step along a new life route is scary, and with good reason, I mean, you never know what is coming and life can sometimes deliberately put stumbling blocks in your way but the step needs to be taken, and the journey may be arduous, but I’m sure that it is worth it.
In the last few years I’ve started making my life about making me happy, I know there’s lots of things I could do to make other people happy but at the end of the day I know that by me being happy, those who care about and love me will be happy too. Making yourself suffer for someone else’s benefit wont help anyone, especially not yourself. I can remember being told that if I was living and spending all my time on someone elses dreams/goals, then I would miss out on my own, and I get that now. I suppose it’s a lack of self esteem thing where I thought that my goals were pointless, or unattainable and therefore pushed them away, I think this is most highlighted in the years after I left school. I had big dreams of seeing the world, had even worked out where I was heading and how but then I fell by the wayside, couldn’t work out how to be able to afford my dreams and still see friends, have a life and not just get drawn into the small town rut when what I should have done was work my ass off for a few months, saved like no-ones business, taken a loan or credit card and just gone. It may not have been for long but i’m so gutted that now I don’t really think this is possible anymore. Well, I have said that if my partner and I were to split then i’d sell everything I could, get a ticket and try my luck….I know that my parents have always told me I should get out into the world and I am so jealous of the life for example that my dad lived in his younger days, but as they get older, I think that me being selfish and getting out there is unfeasible.
Another thing that the above has helped me to apply to my life is that I should enjoy the things I enjoy, and that gives me pleasure. I may not have friends who are 100% with me on everything, but having a wider group of friends has given me so much more verve, more people to talk to, more to learn and I think that’s brilliant. Everyone in this world has something to offer and unfortunately, so many people seem closed off to that, they only want to know what they know, or be with people who share their sentiments. I’m not advocating rowing with people who are different but maybe spend some time with them, talk to them, hear their thoughts and THEN make a decision on them as a person, for example, I worked with someone who is Trans, and now, I have literally no issue with this whatsoever, in fact, them being the person on the outside that they’ve always been on the inside is important to me, yet I met people who were deliberately rude and offensive towards them, because they were afraid of what this person represented to them, a freedom and a bravery like no other. I’m happy to say that the trans person no longer works here and hopefully is being treated as a person by her new employers, not x or y but just a person.
I hope that by reading this, you see what I mean, that sometimes, just being happy should be a main drive in people’s lives. It shouldn’t be an outcome, it should be a by product. Not everything is easy but sometimes, you just need to power on through, knowing that the end justifies the means.
So what do you guys think? Does anyone else have this idea or am I alone? Do you have challenges you want to achieve? If so, why not send me your list, I’d love to see what other people want to do and maybe (who knows) you might help me decide on my next epic challenges!