My ideal dinner party and guests….

A great friend of mine suggested this as a subject matter to me ages ago, and I instantly loved the thought.

It’s a tough choice for me really as I’d love to be all high brow, or classy or whatnot,  but I feel I would want to spend the time with people who I admire and who I think would be time well spent!

Having thought about this for months (literally, I keep going back and forth) I think i’m going to split this into 2 blogs, one for people who I know, miss and love and would love to have dinner with, another of dream guests, so people I do not know in real life, just those who I am a fan of or admire.

I would love to spend time with people who I know and miss terribly, maybe to reclaim my youth, or to feel like I did when I was with them, i’m not sure but I know that if I had a time machine/magic wand/genie in a bottle, these would be some of the people who I would want sat around my table, sharing food, stories and overall love.

A great example of this is Stevie, a friend of mine from Lincolnshire who was killed a few years ago, she was taken from her family and friends suddenly, and I hated that I never got to say an official goodbye but am really happy that the last meeting I had with her was a shock for us both as we bumped into each other on a street in Boston. I’d only popped up there for like 2 days and was thrilled I got to see her, especially her face! the shock yet pleasure will stay with me forever.I miss her face as she was one of the people who could be harsh yet honest, loving and abusive all at the same time. She was brave, independent, loving and incredibly loyal to her friends, often to her detriment, as we were knobs and she just accepted us for that.

My nan would also be on this list, she died on my 10th Birthday and I still talk to her when I need to, I’m not sure she’d be particularly happy with the person I am but I loved her so much. I still feel so much guilt that she died on my birthday, I mean, I was the last person to see her alive and I wish I could apologise to her, I wish she hadn’t been alone and I wish i’d had more awareness to know that she was in pain. She was strong and very opinionated, which probably means if she was still alive today we’d be good battle buddies. I’d like to think she’d like me, but then the reason we moved to Spain was part of mums grieving so maybe I wouldn’t be me, if we stayed in the UK. I wouldn’t be as strong as I am, or so stubborn so maybe i’m constantly hoping that the person I am would be a better person than if i’d have stayed here, but i’m hoping she can still see that I try to be a good person, and maybe that’s better than anything else.

I should say, not everyone on this list has been taken away from me by death, there are just some people who are too far away for me to see them as often as i’d like and the next person is an excellent example of that.

Becky, my Becky. I honestly do love this girl, she is so brilliant and i’m so lucky that when I left spain, we basically lost contact and yet, when we found each other on Facebook, we just snapped back to right as we used to be, not strangers or estranged, but just as we were. I miss her face but am really lucky as we speak most days over messenger and despite everything, she still puts up with me. We are very similar spirits I think as we are both wannabe creative (she is much more creative than me but if a lottery win ever happens, Bartlett and Boylett crafts will happen!) She looked after me so much at school, accepted me and shared her life with me. She seems to be one of my biggest cheerleaders, and although I don’t know why, she is always on my side.

One last person who I really miss speaking with, his partner and he really helped me in the last few months when I was in Spain, Sandra and Gordon lived next door to us and were very fun (not hippies entirely but definitely an hippy vibe let’s say) he was an artist and musician and she is just so much fun, caring, mental, scary, threatening, supportive and a typical (so i’m told) scottish mammy. I spent far too many evenings in their house, drinking wine, smoking and putting the world to rights. Sandra has shown me that fighting for what you feel is right makes you tough. but it’s for a good cause and she is always one of the first people to not only sponsor my foolish acts but also actively threatens others to get involved!

Gordon was taken by Alzheimer’s a few years ago, yet I still remember him fondly and am happy that I got to spend some time with him. I’d love for them both to be reunited again, at my table, to help them feel the love they helped me feel. He is one of the reasons why I try to raise money for Alzhiemer’s research as the most horrific thing about this disease is it takes the person, but leaves the body. I am lucky that the last time I saw Gordon, he was fighting fit, making jokes and being like a grandpa (well, how I imagine a grandpa would be). I can keep that picture of him in my mind.

Sandra is still a huge part of my life, I miss talking to her as frequently as I used to and I miss having her next door to go and hassle at all hours! (she probably doesn’t miss that but hey ho!!) I stay with her whenever I go back to Competa and I’m really pleased that despite the years passing and the miles increasing, I still have my scottish Mammae fighting my corner.

I should point out, these aren’t the ONLY people i’d want to have dinner with, there’s countless friends, family and others who I care enough about to want to spend more time with them but these 5 in specific, stick in my brain and I wish I could spend a little more time with them.

+++update August 2018+++

Sadly Sandra passed away this month, I am writing about her loss and what it means to me but at the moment honestly I’m in too much pain to talk about her too much, apart from the fact she was amazing and I will miss her so much.

If there’s some good that has come from this, it is that I am now trying to actually stick to what I have said I will do. I said to myself over a year ago that I would get out to see her and never got round to it, life just got in the way and now I don’t have the option to see her, which is sad.


Love you guys xx

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